What I Would Say to My Pottery Barn Table Designer
The first thing is I want my table to be simple. Mission-style perhaps. I like clean lines, nothing ostentatious. I’m a simple man with simple tastes and I want my table to reflect this. I want my table to be simple, yet elegant, something crafted from heavy solid wood, like oak, but with a deep mahogany finish to accentuate the wood’s natural grain and color. Also, I’d like it to be rectangular with the interior table portion dropped down about eight inches. A simple, Mission-style rectangular table with a large inset tabletop made of smooth glass such that a little ball could roll smoothly and easily across the table’s surface. Also, this is important: I would like it to have eight steel rods, four inserted on each side of this simple, Mission-style table. While we’re at it, on one end of each rod let’s put a little handle, too. Something for easy gripping. Nothing gaudy, of course. After all, this is a simple table. A simple, Mission-style table with a glass tabletop dropped down eight inches and four steel rods with simple handles inserted on each side. While we’re at it, what if we attach little ornaments to the steel rods? Little hand-carved wooden ornaments? Shaped like men perhaps? Little hand-carved wooden men, maybe with blocks instead of feet such that if there were to be a little ball rolling around on the glass tabletop surface, the little hand-carved ornament men could be spun wildly around using the handles on the steel rods and thus strike the ball with their little block-shaped feet? Yes, I rather like that idea. Also, on each end of the table, parallel to the eight steel rods, let’s go ahead and carve out an opening such that, were the little hand-carved wildly spinning men with block-shaped feet to strike the ball with proper skill introduced by an outside force, like my brother Pete, who would maybe be spinning and directing the steel rods, the ball could actually be, let’s say, “shot” into the little openings. Why, in a moment of levity, one might suggest to a dining companion that a “goal” has been scored. Ho ho! This would be shouted in jest, of course, so as not to offend. And lest offense be taken, perhaps it would be wise to affix a small bar with little counting beads, like the kind found on an abacus, on each end of this simple, Mission-style table so that, were something akin to a ball be struck with skill by the block feet of one of the wildly spinning hand-carved wooden men, there would be no need to shout “Gooooooaaaaaall, in your face, bro!” and one might instead simply slide one of the beads to one side? Do you think? Yes, yes, add that to the design please. I must say, I like your vision. I have a feeling this table is going to be simple, elegant and totally awesome.